When I Finally Started Seeing Prayers Answered
The Prayer Practice I Wish I’d Learned 30 Years Ago
I prayed for decades with little to show for it—until I discovered something I’d been missing.
In my 20s and 30s, I prayed countless times for life to work out the way I wanted. I think I can count on one hand the times praying worked. Or did it? “Maybe it was just a coincidence,” I wondered.
The sheer volume of my unanswered prayers gave me a deep sense of learned helplessness and caused me to be cynical about my faith. I had no framework for praying that worked. All I had were things like the ACTS model, which felt stiff and too formulaic. I wanted something that had some power behind it, but I had no idea what that would be.
In my early 50s, I decided to give prayer another try. I began exploring books on prayer by authors I trusted. The very act of even approaching this topic felt like I was trying to push a boulder with my mind. The resistance was terrible. Yet, I pushed through.
I found one chapter that spoke to me and offered a model I had not considered in the early days of my faith — persistence. The author asserts you can't just give it one pass and expect it to work, but this is exactly what I had been doing most of my adult life - giving it one pass.
The author used Elijah’s prayer for rain as an example. Elijah had to pray for rain seven times before he saw results. Ask. Then do it again. Then do it again. Keep asking.
Before I go any further, I want to acknowledge I am standing on some very tender ground here. I bet each of you has your story about unanswered prayer and the pain it brought. Please understand I am not offering any pat and simple answers here. I can share my story, though. God, in his patience, wanted to show me the next step in my maturity.
For me, I needed to learn that the prayers of my youth were no longer enough. I needed to learn persistence. Frankly, I didn’t have the patience for this message in my 20s. Now the time was right. Persistence may be the very thing you need. Maybe not. Ask God for clarity. I fully believe he will provide it.
With the “ask and ask again” model before me, I dove in. I prayed for my father’s health, my daughter as she moved through high school, my wife, my business, and many other things.
I kept going back day after day, praying over and over again for the same things. Because I tend towards the analytical side, I started tracking everything. I wrote down my start time and end time. I tracked what I prayed for and how long I prayed for it.
I even tracked when I received good news and answers. This practice alone changed my views on prayer. You must write down your answers to prayer. In this age of interruption, do you think you will stand a chance of remembering if you don't?
The crazy thing is that all this persistence worked. For the first time in my life, I started to see my prayers answered. My father's health improved. The bumpy road known as high school smoothed for my daughter. My wife found work in her field. As a writer, I want to bring this experience to you so you can try it for yourself.
This article is the inaugural article in what I call The Prayer Project. It will be a living document, if you will. I am going to give you an inside view of my prayers over the next several months. I am going to use the same persistence model I described above.
While I may pray for things outside this scope, I will document the following:
How long I prayed.
What I prayed for.
What prayers I said.
Answers I received.
Again, I found this exercise incredibly helpful, so I want to share it with you in hopes that it strengthens your prayer life as well.
Before this week is over, choose one thing to pray for daily—and write it down. Track what happens. Then tell us what you see.